'Call me 13': a candidate refuses to get invested
Two candidates jostle over Scooter's echo and one asks to be called 13; House scolds them, teaches diagnosis in transit and rides alone.
Thirteen's Best Moments
Every House moment featuring Thirteen, in story order. Played by Olivia Wilde.
211 moments · 4h 51m · by Favseen
Moments 1–30 of 211
- 01
- 02
The women blame beach threadworms, then carry the patient to the toilet
A fainting SMA patient jokes about death by power chair; the women blame a worm caught lying in Thai sand and must help him produce a stool sample.
- 03
House reads the candidates' lives aloud, then puts the men in the penalty box
House calls out an engaged ex-Doctors Without Borders candidate, misreads Thirteen, reveals one man isn't a real doctor, and benches the men.
- 04
House interrogates Thirteen, who admits she's hiding everything
The tilt table proves the women right and the patient enjoys the ride; House turns the report into a grilling about Thirteen's secrets.
- 05
House briefs his 'angels' by speakerphone while Bosley fetches coffee
Over a whipped mocha, House briefs his 'angels', mixes up Amber and Thirteen, and hands out new nicknames, including one for Cole.
- 06
Graveyard shift: the candidates dig up a body and probe Thirteen
Nobody wants to dig, a latecomer arrives with donuts, Thirteen is accused of hiding everything on purpose, and the corpse is in backwards.
- 07
The patient says a man in a wheelchair blames them for killing his dog
The patient insists her mother is right there, calls the doctors mean and incompetent, and passes on what a man with a wheelchair keeps saying.
- 08
The flower ceremony: a planted dog collar and Henry's exit
House hands out peonies, calls the planted dog collar a beautiful overreach, and lets Henry go.
- 09
Cuddy installs Foreman as House's boss
House's differential is interrupted when Cuddy announces she has rehired Foreman as her eyes and ears, and House asks where Foreman will keep his balls.
- 10
The great mayonnaise announcement
House explains how mirror patients read people, assigns cultures and a car search, and announces a fake mayonnaise scare to flood Cuddy's clinic with doctors.
- 11
Is your name Thirteen?
The patient's car yields only VapoRub and receipts; House asks Thirteen why she volunteered to stay away from the patient and the mirror.
- 12
You all suck, none of you are fired
House tears apart every fellow's mistakes on the case, declares they all tie for sucking most, and then fires nobody.
- 13
What would House do?
The fellows argue whether Foreman is testing them; he refuses to play House, apologizes to Casey, and she turns feverish and delirious.
- 14
Foreman's fellows fight for points
Lupus, MS and meningitis collide amid flirting jabs; Foreman accuses the fellows of chasing House's approval, then grants three hours of tests.
- 15
Foreman: House built a cutthroat world
After two fellows treated behind his back, Foreman says none of them care about the medicine and blames the game House set up.
- 16
Polio, and Foreman throws Brennan off
Brennan insists the paralysis is polio, no American case in 20 years or not; Foreman tells him to take a personal day and leave his case.
- 17
House locks the film crew in the MRI room
The fellows learn the new hire was hand-picked; House leads everyone on a walk for the camera and shuts the crew away behind the magnet doors.
- 18
Wrong job, wrong profession, wrong species
Asked why he hired her late, House says fairness was never on offer, then proposes the boy is huffing Freon.
- 19
A differential played for the paparazzi
With the camera rolling, the fellows preen with ties and lipstick; House mocks them, and Taub warns that a stomach scope could be dangerous.
- 20
Lyme disease and the danger of pretty girls
House defends his hires' bad ideas to Wilson; then Thirteen proves Lyme disease, and House wonders how many lives pretty girls have cost.
- 21
House's challenge: steal Cuddy's thong
With no cases, House makes Kutner bet his job on the magician and sets a contest: whoever brings him Cuddy's thong gets immunity and nominates two for firing.
- 22
House suspects Thirteen is hiding something
House poses a riddle about a clumsy, frightened woman and tells Thirteen he thinks she's hiding a medical condition; she brushes it off.
- 23
House predicts the pagers
House mocks the death prediction, calls a page before it happens, and floats amyloidosis while refusing credit for a lucky guess.
- 24
House uncovers Thirteen's Huntington's fear
House reveals Thirteen's mother died of Huntington's, admits switching her decaf to explain the tremor, and asks why she won't get tested.
- 25
The team treats House, then drugs him
The fellows hound feverish House for symptoms while he insists he's fine, until the room starts spinning.
- 26
Presto: blood type AB out of a hat
House explains Finn got the wrong blood type because an autoimmune disease made him look type AB, and finally has a case of lupus.
- 27
Thirteen refuses the envelope
House offers Thirteen her Huntington's test results; she argues that running out of questions means running out of hope.
- 28
Points, speed and the staff of treatment
The candidates race to shout diagnoses; House argues twenty-out-of-twenty symptoms means a hidden disease, docks points and hands one person the right to test.
- 29
Malaria, and the anatomical model from Grandma House
A candidate floats relapsing malaria against the drug theory, and House turns on the team for wrecking an anatomical model with a dubious origin story.
- 30
A heavy penalty for a test nobody authorized
The patient goes into respiratory failure, Foreman is caught tailing the team, and House docks a candidate for a sneaky lumbar puncture.