Cold open: a newborn's secret and Jackson's collapse
Doctors tell new parents their baby has both male and female DNA and they must choose; years later, Jackson collapses during a basketball game.
S5E16 · The Softer Side
20 moments · 25 min of essential viewing in a 44-minute episode.
Moments, in order
House goes along with the parents' MRI
House mocks the case and the parents' demand to call testosterone 'vitamins', then meets the parents and agrees to their MRI without a fight.
Jackson can't breathe during his scope
With his parents beside him, Jackson's bladder scope turns into an emergency when fluid fills the sac around his heart.
House riffs on being fazed
The team notices House shrugging off an unexplained coincidence; he riffs on how fazed he is until the testosterone ties it together.
Wilson accuses Cuddy of sleeping with House
Wilson lists House's strangely polite behaviour and concludes Cuddy slept with him; she denies it and says it's not a crisis.
House stops breathing
The team finds House unresponsive and not breathing; he comes to with a purple nipple and blames too much Vicodin.
Foreman and Thirteen's ice cream metaphor
Searching Jackson's home, Foreman asks Thirteen if she misses women; the metaphor leads them to realise the team knows they're still together.
Foreman figures out House is on heroin
The team reveals they knew about Foreman and Thirteen, which makes Foreman realise what House missed and call it in.
Wilson's bourbon tox screen
Wilson orders House a celebratory drink; House sees through it as a test for heroin, since a drink could stop his breathing.
House's secret: methadone
Caught making himself vomit, House admits he's on methadone, not heroin, and explains why: his leg doesn't hurt anymore.
Jackson learns the truth
Cuddy refuses to remove Thirteen from the case; then Jackson asks his parents if he's a boy or a girl and throws them out.
House chooses methadone over his job
Cuddy confronts House in the bathroom and bans methadone in her hospital; House quits rather than give up a life without pain.
Jackson's friend, and the poem
Jackson confides his worries about a friend on his team; when the poem found in his room comes up, he explains it was an English assignment.
Foreman in charge, Thirteen's guilt
With House gone and Foreman in charge, the team argues diagnoses; Foreman tells Thirteen she's choosing the theory that spares her guilt.
House hires a hooker to watch him sleep
A visitor finds a woman leaving House's place: he hired her to make sure he keeps breathing, and he's shaved for a job meeting.
Thirteen says she's not okay
Foreman admires Thirteen's heels; she admits she isn't okay, and the patient's improvement leads them to rule out scleroderma.
Cuddy offers House his job back
Expecting a reference letter, House gets Cuddy's list of methadone rules instead, and a job offer.
House walks back in
House rejoins the team, finds Foreman and Thirteen arrived at the same theory, and lands on energy drinks.
House blames the parents
House tells Jackson's parents that dehydration, energy drinks and the MRI they demanded nearly killed their son, then delivers a harsh parting line.
House gives up methadone
House tells Cuddy he's quitting methadone: his good mood made him order the MRI that made the patient sick; Cuddy says he's afraid of change.
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